August 6, 2017 By Dania Alshafei / Photography Aya Alshafei
A2F Third Trimester Dania

Some personal thoughts in the middle of my third trimester.

E I G H T   W E E K S   L E F T

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I don’t even know where to begin with this post.

It seems like the other day I announced I was expecting, and now here I am counting down the weeks in the single digits. I am so thankful for the kind of pregnancy that I have experienced. Nausea at the beginning, a smooth ride through the second trimester sans-cravings, and lots of family and friend support throughout it all. But let me tell you one thing, this past month has not been the easiest for me. While my body seems to have a decent hold on how to adjust to this growing human inside of me, my energy and emotions do not.  I know that through social media, it’s hard to get a firm grasp on how everything is going behind the scenes… even if our personal life is more exposed than others.  I get frequent messages on how to stay positive throughout this time, and while I feel like I do have a good handle on how to do that, there are days where I just don’t.  I wanted to share that with all of you because my life and pregnancy is far from perfect, and I want to make sure that all of you who follow along on my crazy journey know that.

Being a therapist has really helped me overcome some of my anxious thoughts and minor emotional attacks, but knowing how to control emotions can only help so much when your hormones literally take that control away.  The lack of motivation and energy should be an entirely different topic of discussion, as I have been sleeping for 10+ hours a night with frequent naps throughout the day.

Sometimes it’s overwhelming feeling all of this at once. It makes me wonder if I will ever get back to the happy Dania who is always positive and doesn’t sweat the small stuff. I’m sure that I will (all the books say I will!), but I’m also sure that the love of being a mother would have made all of it worth it even if I don’t. Change has never been my strong suit, but I have a feeling that this change will be the most worthwhile. Maybe it’s the lack of being able to see the end result that makes it hazy to see the future. My countdown has entered in the 50’s, so I’m in the final stretch. The tears and the overthinking and the restlessness will all be over soon and will be traded for sleepless nights with her.

We can’t wait to meet you, baby girl.

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